Today on the Dream Village, I’m honored to share an interview with Domonique. Dominique is a birth mom who chose adoption for her son in 2017. So many people share stories from the adoptive family’s perspective, which is beautiful, but I want The Dream Village to be a place where one can see adoption from all angles.

 

Adoption is beautiful. It’s a miracle. But it also requires a very heavy, difficult decision on the part of birth families. 

 

Read to get a glimpse of this side of adoption. 
birth mom, adoption, adoption story
DV: How far along were you when you began to consider adoption as an option?

 

Dominique: Adoption was mentioned to me early on in my first trimester. I considered it as an option for myself in my third trimester.

 

DV:  What made you consider adoption? Or what was your first experience with adoption? Basically, what was the initial trigger that made you even think about it?

 

Dominique: A woman I met from church that I did not have a relationship with mentioned it first. I had never heard of adoption. I thought there was only CPS. I processed adoption as an option because I wasn’t financially stable.

 

DV: Had you had any experience with adoption prior to yours?

 

Dominique: No

 

DV: Is your adoption open or closed?

 

Dominique: Started completely closed and we are best friends now.

 

DV: How early did you meet your child’s adoptive family? Did you develop a relationship with them prior to the birth?

 

Dominique: I met them late in my pregnancy.

 

DV: Do you have contact with your child’s adoptive family now? If so, can you describe the type of relationship you have with them?

 

Dominique: Yes, we are really good friends. They are a part of my immediate family. Ryan is the male figure I always needed/wanted in my life and Ally is like my older sister. We had to fight a hard, long fight to get there. I used to think I hated her! I viewed them as my enemy right after placing.

 

DV: Did you ever second guess your decision? Either before or after it was finalized?

 

Dominique: Yes, I left the hospital because I wanted to take him home. I also went back and forth between abortion and adoption.

 

DV: What was the hardest part of the process?

 

Dominque: Putting pen to paper.

 

DV: What would you want other moms considering adoption to know about the process or the emotions involved?

 

Dominique: You are in control… you make the decisions. Don’t let others make them for you with their opinions. You know what you need. Trust yourself!  Be empowered to parent or place! Both are awesome! You are a great mom either way. No one can/will ever take that away from you.

 

DV: What would you want to say to other people considering adoption?

 

Dominique: To the adoptive parent: Trust the birth mom that she made the decision to place, which means she is smart of enough to ask for help and admit she wants more than what she could provide, which is hard and not even you always admit when you need help. Acknowledge her strength and wisdom in that. Love her through it all, even the hardest of hards and happiest of happy.

 

You can watch Dominique’s emotional journey by clicking here!