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Meet Dominique: A Birth Mom's Adoption Story

Today on the Dream Village, I’m honored to share an interview with Domonique. Dominique is a birth mom who chose adoption for her son in 2017. So many people share stories from the adoptive family’s perspective, which is beautiful, but I want The Dream Village to be a place where one can see adoption from all angles.

 

Adoption is beautiful. It’s a miracle. But it also requires a very heavy, difficult decision on the part of birth families. 

 

Read to get a glimpse of this side of adoption. 

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DV: How far along were you when you began to consider adoption as an option?

 

Dominique: Adoption was mentioned to me early on in my first trimester. I considered it as an option for myself in my third trimester.

 

DV:  What made you consider adoption? Or what was your first experience with adoption? Basically, what was the initial trigger that made you even think about it?

 

Dominique: A woman I met from church that I did not have a relationship with mentioned it first. I had never heard of adoption. I thought there was only CPS. I processed adoption as an option because I wasn’t financially stable.

 

DV: Had you had any experience with adoption prior to yours?

 

Dominique: No

 

DV: Is your adoption open or closed?

 

Dominique: Started completely closed and we are best friends now.

 

DV: How early did you meet your child’s adoptive family? Did you develop a relationship with them prior to the birth?

 

Dominique: I met them late in my pregnancy.

 

DV: Do you have contact with your child’s adoptive family now? If so, can you describe the type of relationship you have with them?

 

Dominique: Yes, we are really good friends. They are a part of my immediate family. Ryan is the male figure I always needed/wanted in my life and Ally is like my older sister. We had to fight a hard, long fight to get there. I used to think I hated her! I viewed them as my enemy right after placing.

 

DV: Did you ever second guess your decision? Either before or after it was finalized?

 

Dominique: Yes, I left the hospital because I wanted to take him home. I also went back and forth between abortion and adoption.

 

DV: What was the hardest part of the process?

 

Dominque: Putting pen to paper.

 

DV: What would you want other moms considering adoption to know about the process or the emotions involved?

 

Dominique: You are in control… you make the decisions. Don’t let others make them for you with their opinions. You know what you need. Trust yourself!  Be empowered to parent or place! Both are awesome! You are a great mom either way. No one can/will ever take that away from you.

 

DV: What would you want to say to other people considering adoption?

 

Dominique: To the adoptive parent: Trust the birth mom that she made the decision to place, which means she is smart of enough to ask for help and admit she wants more than what she could provide, which is hard and not even you always admit when you need help. Acknowledge her strength and wisdom in that. Love her through it all, even the hardest of hards and happiest of happy.

 

You can watch Dominique’s emotional journey by clicking here!


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An Adoption Story--Meet Alonzo

An adoption story submitted by Courtney Barron

I would not specifically say I was inspired to adopt, but I will share a little of my story. When Alonzo was 3 and half years old, he was about to be taken away from my younger sister and placed into the state’s custody due to her many addictions and the lifestyle she was leading. I got the call from another family member on August 8th, 2015 as I was leaving work, asking me to come get Alonzo because in that moment I was the only qualified person in my family. By that I mean I had no criminal history, no drug use, I had a stable job, stable living, etc.

So I then rushed to get Alonzo. He didn’t understand what was going on at that time, and I wasn’t sure of what I was doing myself. For many days and nights, I cried wondering how I would succeed in life, how would I achieve all of the things I wanted to at the age of 21 when I all of a sudden had a child thrown to me. Well, I had high hopes and prayed many, many prayers that my sister would get it together and be reunited with him. However, that’s not how it played out. Her rights were terminated.

She became pregnant with baby number 2 when Alonzo was 5 years old. The social worker then asked if i could take baby number 2 when it was born. I kindly refused. I was only 23. I wasn’t sure if I could handle a new born and a 5 year old while balancing a full time job all by myself with no family or anyone around. To make this story short and sweet, the middle baby was adopted by a wonderful couple and Alonzo was adopted by me on the same day, April 6th, 2018. This was the best day of our lives. Walking on eggshells was finally over!

But to sum this story up, we could not–I COULD NOT–have made it through without God! He made this all possible. He gave me the strength to carry on when I thought there was no hope.

And here we are today, one year after adoption, still feeling a little unreal but amazing!

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Your Stories Archives - The Dream Village

An Adoption Story - Meet Primrose

Written by Eryn Austin.  <—– Click to follow her on Instagram!

Source: Love What Matters <—– Original story can be found here.

“Sitting here writing this story, a squirmy little hand keeps tapping anxiously at my leg. She doesn’t feel well, some new mystery illness or pain that we can’t quite figure out. So, she sticks close to us, doing everything she can to feel better while we, helpless in so many ways, do everything we can to make her feel better. This has been the cycle of our lives for over 3 years now. Meeting Primrose, and becoming her family, turned our idyllic life on its head and then spun it until we were all dizzy and dazed. And completely, unabashedly – in love.

Courtesy of Eryn Austin

The first time I saw her beautiful face, I was browsing Facebook and came across an adoption advocacy post. My husband, Chris, and I had known since 2011 we were going to pursue adoption from China. We knew it because it had grown in our hearts for so long, it was inevitably part of our story. So, in 2014, when her photo came across my screen, I instantly emailed asking for information.

It was clear from her photo that she was blind, had the most delicious cheeks, and loved a good snuggle. All still true to this day. Her piercing blue eyes were mesmerizing. She was just a bundle of love that we desperately wanted to be ours. So we got her ‘file’ and started to have it reviewed by trusted doctors and specialists. Their initial reaction was heartbreaking – words like ‘this will be too much for your family to handle,’ and ‘I think you are getting in over your head,’ and the worst ‘How do you plan to parent a child who is described as deaf and blind? She will live in total darkness. Total silence.’ We had one agonizing night of fighting these words and trying to decide – are they right? Is this too much? And to my horror, we sent her file back to the agency and begged them to get an updated medical file for her so we could have more information. Chris held me while I cried myself to sleep that night. He told me again and again, ‘If she is ours, she is ours, we can find a way.’

Paige Ewing Photography

A couple weeks later, an email came in that completely wiped all doubt from our minds. We talked to new specialists who agreed with a resounding, ‘YES – go get that sweet girl!!’

We started the process to adopt her in the fall of 2014. Nothing was keeping us from her. Not the cost or the wait or the unknown. Some days felt so despairing. Two different Christmas holidays came and went without her, and it felt like our hearts would break knowing she was alone, but we were so hopeful and knew – come 2016, she would be in our family forever.

Let me be super clear about this as well. No matter how sure we were in those long days of paperwork and fingerprints and money wires, we were also terrified. Determination and fear go together on this journey, which is perfect, because years before, this became the theme of our life: Act – even when we are afraid. We were committed to do the hard things because they matter more than the comfortable things.

In January of 2016, we finally put our hands on Primrose, our beloved daughter. She was so sick, a newly acquired strep infection we found out soon. She was tiny and listless, couldn’t hold her head up, scalding with fever. We instantly went into battle mode the moment our skin touched hers.

Courtesy of Eryn Austin

I want to walk you through those first 3 days so you know how hard and how WORTH IT every single step was.

After meeting her and being so confused as to why she seemed so sick, but no one knew what was going on, we walked and walked around an unfamiliar city to try to find formula (she came with none) and meds for her fever. I remember thinking we would walk for miles and never find what we needed. I’ve never been so afraid. Our baby was screaming and so very sick and. We were helpless.

I remember getting back to the hotel, feeding her, getting her fever down and messaging with our agency. Sobbing. Wanting to comfort her. Putting on a brave face for our big kids as we introduced them to Prim over FaceTime and explained what was happening. Watching her breathe while she slept for 16 hours – sickness and grief mingle together – and her body just shut down.

Courtesy of Eryn Austin

We woke up the next day and the screaming began. So we set off for two different Chinese hospitals, experienced the most incredible miracles, communicated with an American doctor from Prim’s hometown who called all of the shots through the people assisting us. We finally had the meds we needed. The whole time I was saying ‘strep – she has horrible strep!!!’ and the final diagnosis was systemic strep with blood work that would have had her in ICU in the states.

Courtesy of Eryn Austin

Getting back to the hotel after 9 hours in hospitals, we administered medications and within hours, we start to see face change. She started to giggle and smile. We got a few actual snuggles. We all slept soundly. Finally.

We woke the next morning to a text from our guide, because they wanted us to wait to adopt her. It wasn’t malice, please know. But to see a couple come for a complicated and disabled daughter, just to find her critically ill, as well, these people helping us couldn’t understand how we could move forward with the adoption until we were certain SHE WOULD LIVE. I responded verbatim, ‘WE WANT THIS GIRL NO MATTER WHAT.’

Adoption day came. Chris and I clung to one another.

I cried the whole day, smiled and wept over the fingerprints we both smudged onto her official papers. She was finally ours. She was ours all along.

Courtesy of Eryn Austin
Courtesy of Eryn Austin

We taught her to drink without aspirating, we taught her to eat from a spoon and started to help her learn to sit with support from pillows or our legs. We spoke in our broken newly acquired Mandarin,  ‘Primrose, we love you. Mama and Daddy love you.’ We told her about her home, her brother and sister and animals waiting for her. We sang songs to her and gave her endless tickles. She slowly began to accept our comforting, and she started to very slowly accept us. And as we lifted into the sky to head back across the ocean, I whispered to her anxious little heart, ‘You will never be alone again, Primrose.’

Courtesy of Eryn Austin

From those early days to this exact day right now, we have been in the fight of our lives for her health, her trust, and her heart. Grief and loss come hand in hand with adoption. It simply doesn’t matter the circumstances, the age at adoption, the country of origin. Adoption = trauma. We were prepared. We knew she was more than worth every ounce of ourselves, of our two older kids and of the community she would become a part of. But the ways it has changed us… we didn’t expect that.

Courtesy of Eryn Austin

Primrose is a light. Her joy is all encompassing. Her laughter is infectious and her brilliant mind ever a mystery. Her spirit is wild and ferocious. Her face is pure magic. Our life is complete with her here. Truly. And I say that never meaning that life is perfect. You cannot walk through life without HARDSHIP, right? None of us is immune to struggle. We did choose her. We chose this life. We chose this hard. But, man. It is absolutely an honor to be her parents, her family.

Primrose has a rare genetic syndrome – 6p25 – and honestly, we are still figuring it all out. It is FACT, however, that this rare condition caused her blindness, her unique brain structure, her lack of muscle tone, and some other fascinating challenges she faces. This makes the day to day living so complicated. So different. Not less beautiful, but somehow, actually, RICHER.

Courtesy of Eryn Austin

Our family went from comfortably living life, vacationing at Disney, going and doing as we please, to being advocates, researchers, amateur physicians and therapists. Her body has endured countless surgeries and procedures, medical trauma, crashing in an ER, a life flight in the middle of the night, anguish and pain I cannot comprehend. We don’t get much sleep, we have to perfectly plan every outing. Some days she cannot leave the house and everything has to stop in its tracks to help her. So yeah… Our lives have been totally upended. Nothing is the same. It is NOT easy. And I hear this all the time: ‘I don’t know how you do it!’

We don’t either. But let’s look at the other side of this coin for a second.

What if we had NOT done it? What if we had been too afraid? What if I had never seen her face? What if we had not said yes?

Where would she be in a few years? Would anyone else have seen her face and fallen in love like we did? What if they didn’t?

Our oldest kiddos could have missed out on the joy of their younger sister. Our family would be incomplete. Our hearts lacking some magic piece. Our lives a bit simpler, yes. Maybe less stares. Definitely less medical bills and appointments. Certainly less therapies, and most definitely less continuing education in all things sensory.

But also, less joy. Less hope. Less laughter. Less wonder. Less.

Courtesy of Eryn Austin
Courtesy of Eryn Austin

Loving a child from a hard place is very dirty work. It’s impossible to play any part in foster care or adoption and not see and know it and be totally overwhelmed by it. Your hands and heart dig into dirt that seems unworkable, but you dig in again and again. And there are seldom all the answers, and mostly just blind faith, as you dig and work and try. And day after day the hard work comes with the joy – and sometimes the hard is all there is – but the worth is the precious child. And love doesn’t cure everything, but it is always a start.

Even now, 3 years later, we don’t always see the hard coming. It shows up just BAM. And we go into ‘how do we manage this, how do we help?’ mode like a crisis intervention plan at home. For Prim, hard has been her norm for a while. Horrific pain and unforeseen complications from her complex eye pathology caused her to have a double eye enucleation/removal this past fall. I would never have guessed we would walk that road. Traumatic ER visits, PICU stays, multiple surgeries, rehabilitation, PTSD. We have lost a lot of ground since August 2018, but we are here, rebuilding trust and communication and lost confidence.

Courtesy of Eryn Austin

Patience and persistence. That hard dirt work with the hands and heart, knowing that time cannot heal everything but it does bring a new season, a fresh sunrise, a beautiful new tide.

I sit here today telling Prim she is safe, that Mama and Daddy are here, that we will hold her every second if that is what she needs to feel better. We will always chase her heart. And more than anything, we would always go for her, even knowing the great cost to our comfort. We would go again in a second.

Because in gaining a family, Primrose gave us a miracle. Herself. Her precious life. Her worthy and beautiful heart. She has given that to us and it is so much more than we bring to the table. Every second with her is surrounded by magic. An air of anticipation. Even the hard is beautiful because she belongs. Here with us. With her brother and sister. Forever.

And here we cling to one another, all of our messes merging into one big mess, as it is with family. As it should be unconditionally.”

Courtesy of Eryn Austin


Your Stories Archives - The Dream Village

An Adoption Story - When God Calls You to Adopt, Answer!

When God Calls...

Watch this story about the Herring Family! If God has called you to adopt, please answer. All it takes is one step at a time…


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An Adoption Story - An Unlikely Coincidence

Adoption Details...

Today, I’m sharing a story I stumbled on and had to read a couple times because it’s so crazy! When God calls you to adopt, He’s ALWAYS in the details. Always.

I don’t know Susan but her story touched me. If you have ever thought about adoption, there are tons of resources and people willing to share about their experiences. Adoption isn’t easy, but it’s not as difficult as you’d think!

An Adoption Seed

I feel like God plants an “adoption seed” in some of us at a very young age. For me, it was at 14 years old when we brought my adopted brother home from the hospital. I instantly knew I would adopt one day.

If that seed has been planted in you, reach out to someone who has adopted. Shoot me an email. I’m not an expert but I’m happy to tell you what I know.

Somewhere your child could be sitting in an orphanage waiting for you to come get him or her. Don’t wait any longer… children don’t need perfect parents, a huge house, and tons of material things. All they need is love. If you’ve got love to give, then you’re ready.

Read about Susan’s adoption story here: http://www.susanme.com/my-adoption-story/

 

 

 

 


Your Stories Archives - The Dream Village

An Adoption Story -- Meet the Nolens

An Adoption Story submitted by Cheryl Nolen

Our daughter, Whitney, is adopted. We brought her home from the hospital when she was 3 days old.

We were infertility patients and had tried every procedure available to help us conceive. After 8 years of medical intervention to help us, my doctor had a very honest discussion about our specific issues. He encouraged us to adopt because he firmly believed we would never have success in having a biological child. After all we’d been through I finally felt resolved about being a mother to a child born by someone else.

We used Adoption Advisory whose offices were in Dallas. From start to finish our process took approximately 2 years. We actually tried many other agencies for over a year before that.

When we went to the hospital to get Whitney, we were over the moon with excitement and anticipation. When they brought her through the door of the waiting room, we thought she had to be the most perfect, beautiful baby ever born.

Whitney was a challenge early on. Her strong will constantly forced us to draw on reserves of patience that we never knew existed. She struggled with rejection from birth parents during her teen years, wondering why she was “given away.” We told her that God chose to make her ours so that she’d have a good life.

I haven’t met or spoken to her, but Whitney has met her birth mother, as well as her parents. It was mostly a positive experience. She feels strongly that she and her boys need to enjoy a strong relationship with us in spite of knowing her birth family.

Before we adopted Whitney, we were actually matched with a different birth mother but it all fell apart when the child was born. The birth mother pulled out of her agreement with the agency and chose to pursue a private adoption. We never knew why, except our trust was in God that He had a different plan for a different child for us.

There were times during the difficult teen years that I wondered if God had chosen the wrong parents for Whitney. As an adult with children of her own, Whitney and I see that God does all things well. We can see that so clearly as we look back.

After Whitney was almost 4, we had a very big surprise- I had a baby boy, Spencer! I can say sincerely that I love them both the same, no matter how they came to us. We never dwelled on Whitney being adopted and people were always surprised to learn that. God chose to build our family differently, so we accepted His will. We feel so blessed to have had the children He gave us.

 

Do you have an adoption story you want to share? Whether you are an adoptee or an adoptive parent, we want to hear about your journey. Submit your story here!

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An Adoption Story-Meet the Sampsons

An Adoption Story submitted by Sarah Sampson

“First, let me say that I believe every adoption is a beautiful miracle.

Just like childbirth, no two stories are the same. Our story is not your typical adoption story. For us it began in December 2005 when I was attending a Christmas concert with friends. I was 2 weeks away from delivering my 4th child. During the concert, they showed a spotlight video that highlighted a ministry called Shohannah’s Hope, an organization that raises money to helps families adopt internationally. I was so moved by the video, it hit something deep inside me and I came away with a compelling feeling that I would adopt someday.

I went home and shared my experience with my husband. He chalked it up to pregnancy hormones and pretty much told me I was crazy. We were on the verge of having 4 children under the age of five, including a set of twins. Life got busy when the baby came and I kind of put my experience on the back burner. My baby started kindergarten in 2011, and with my youngest in school, the desire to adopt came back to me. I didn’t have long to entertain it before my kinder daughter was diagnosed with Type 1 Diabetes. That was such a life changing event for her and our family that I put adoption on the back burner yet again.

Fast forward to fall of 2013.

I had gone back to school to get my teaching certification. I was driving across Houston several times a week and my thoughts on my drive would always go to the possibility of adopting. It seemed everywhere I turned, whether I was in church, at my kid’s school, or driving down the road, I would see something or hear something that related to adoption. At this point, I knew God was speaking to me loud and clear. I approached my husband again about the idea and he still wasn’t completely on board. He told me that if God wanted us to adopt he was going to have to put a baby on our doorstep. That way we would know it was from Him.

Well, I knew that wasn’t how things worked so I began to research adoption agencies and options. I became consumed with the idea and I began to share my desire with my friends and family. Through an unlikely series of events, a family friend’s daughter had just found out she was expecting and at that point in her life keeping the baby was not an option. The family knew that we were interested in adoption and asked if we would meet with them. This is not how adoptions typically happen but we knew we had to see where it would lead. By seeking and following legal counsel, we proceeded with the process. Even though a birth mother cannot finalize her decision until after the baby’s birth, we were committed to walking out the journey with her. 

On June 27, 2014, Eli Thomas came into the world.

His birth mother requested our presence at his birth. My husband and I were the first to hold him. It was one of the most amazing experiences of our lives. From the moment we held him, we knew he was going to be part of our family. Eli wasn’t legally ours until April 17th, 2015 when our family stood before a judge in a Galveston County Courthouse as we committed ourselves to him and he was officially given our name.  Eli’s adoption was a private adoption but we still had to go through the legal process including interviews and home studies for everything to be finalized.

Eli’s birth mother is an amazing woman. We have a unique relationship with her and she is a part of Eli’s life. I want him to know how much she loves him and how that love affected the decision she made. When I think of adoption my heart is torn. I know that it is a difficult choice for a birth mother. It requires love and so much bravery, but something so beautiful can come from that choice.

Adoption isn’t always easy.

It can be complicated and challenging at times, but when you look into the eyes of your child it’s worth all that is difficult. People often ask us about our decision to adopt. Some say we are crazy since Eli makes five children for us. We often hear the comment: “What a blessed little boy Eli is.” We turn that around and say we are the ones who are blessed. Every time I look at him I think of the miracle that he is. How he was a desire in my heart 9 years before he came to our family.  He brings so much joy to our lives and the lives of those around us! We love him more than words.

I would encourage anyone who has considered adoption to pursue it! There are many wonderful agencies for local and international adoption that can lead you through the process. If it’s a desire in your heart, it can become a reality and lives can be forever changed by your decision!”

 

A note from Trisha:

I met Sarah and her husband at my son’s basketball game. My daughter and I walked into the gym and I had intentions of sitting in a seat close to the door. However, she spotted her step mom and grandma and said “Let’s go sit over there.” I had no idea a divine appointment was about to happen. The Sampsons were sitting next to me and I noticed that Eli had super dark hair compared to them. I started a conversation and found out he was adopted. I told them about The Dream Village and asked if they would be interested in sharing their story. I love when God gives me a reminder that He’s in control here.

If you’re interested in sharing your adoption story, click here for more info.


adopt, adoption, orphans, foster care, family

Adoption Story - Meet the Millers

An Adoption Story… Submitted to The Dream Village by Kortni Miller

“I’ve never won the lottery, but I imagine it kind of feels like being handed your three-day-old baby boy for the first time and hearing the words “Congratulations, you are a mother.” Especially after the long and lonely road it took to get to him.

Our adoption story really began as a sophomore in high school in the backseat of a car with all my girlfriends, driving to the hospital to offer our young teenage support to one of our best friends, who was about to place her baby boy into the arms of a woman she didn’t know and say goodbye to him forever.  I don’t think even then that I realized the magnitude of her choice. By the time we got to the hospital she had already delivered him and to this day I still remember my friend laying there, a sheen of sweat still visible on her forehead, tired, solemn and more quiet than usual. And in that moment I realized that she was the bravest person I’d ever known. I wouldn’t know this until years later, but that strong and selfless friend of mine prepared a hidden chamber of my heart for the beauty of adoption.

I remember vividly the night it all came full circle. Ten years later I was snuggled up on the couch with my husband, both of us completely speechless after watching the movie Martian Child. The story hit us like ice cold water to the face. We both knew we wanted to adopt at some point in life, but we hadn’t tried anything exceptional to have kids yet so it wasn’t exactly the first thing on our minds…Until we saw that movie and heard the line “how do you argue against loving one who’s already here?” From that moment on, adoption was all we could think about.

The next day my husband called me from work and said “I don’t know how, but we need to start the adoption process today.” We met with an agency that night and handed them a check with all the money in our account to cover the intake fee and not a clue how we would pay the rest. Our profile was shown to an expectant mom a week later and Eli was in our arms exactly one month after the night we watched that movie. It was nothing short of a miracle.

It is hard for me to find words for the beauty of the moment my boys were placed in my arms. The only one that comes close is AWE. I felt quiet and small. Standing there, I felt like my heart had taken up residence in my throat and it would come crawling out if I tried to speak. The awe of everything that had just taken place made me wonder if I should slip my shoes off because I felt as if I was suddenly standing on the most holy ground. That is what the adoption journey is. Holy ground. Every step of the way.

If I could travel through time and talk to my 24 year-old self, the girl who was staring at her twentieth negative pregnancy test, I might tell her something like this: One day she is going to be alarmed when all of her friends start having one, and then two kids and she doesn’t have any yet. She is going to pray for a baby for so long until the day she can’t see the point in asking anymore. She is going to know what it feels like to be angry with God, and sad. Really, truly, deeply sad when she realizes the babies are not coming. But then I would gently grab her shoulders and look her in her now worried eyes and I would say to her; ‘Listen. God has every intention of completely wrecking your soul more than once in your life so you will know what it means to let Him put it back together again. And one day that will happen when you find yourself holding your husband’s hand in a small office at an adoption agency and the case worker will get off the phone and tell you that you are now the mother of a three day old baby boy. That is when you will close your eyes and thank God for all of those unanswered prayers. But just you wait, it will happen again. Just when you think your heart can’t hold any more love, a beautiful girl will lay her baby in your arms and make you a mother of two.’ And then I would hug her tight and tell her sorry for spoiling the ending, but everything is going to be okay, because her heart knows no happiness like mine does right now.

Even though infertility wasn’t the deciding factor for us in choosing to adopt, it was the push we needed to do something we had always planned on whether we got pregnant or not. I know that’s not everyone’s story though, and none of that discredits the very real truth that infertility still hurts something fierce.

When you are being held in God’s hands like that, it is hard to understand what He is making out of you. You ask why, why would He keep you from having the one thing you always wanted…that He wanted for me? You don’t feel the space being created in your heart or the soul stretching that is taking place. And you can’t hear Him through all the frustration and tears telling you to please hold on, ‘I am working on your prayers and what I have for you is better than you ever imagined.’

I didn’t hear or feel any of that until I saw that little face that looked nothing like my own for the first time–staring up at me, begging me to love him.  And that’s when I knew. That’s when it dawned on me exactly the kind of heart all of the days and months and years of waiting shaped inside me. I began to realize that if God wouldn’t have spent that extra time on me, I wouldn’t be here holding this baby and being asked to love him. I wouldn’t have known that I could. I wouldn’t have known that the disappointment of seeing one line on that pregnancy test month after endless month could become the most beautiful thing I’d ever seen while I was holding my baby; who would’ve never been in my arms had the stick read positive.”

We’re so grateful that Kortni was willing to share her adoption story with us. Please check out Kortni’s Instagram and read more! She’s a fantastic writer! instagram.com/born.from.my.heart


adopt, adoption, orphans, foster care, family

Adoption Story - Meet Liam

I can’t pinpoint the exact moment God gave me a desire to adopt. It was a desire that just grew naturally throughout my life. Adoption always felt normal to me. It always felt like another beautiful way that God forms a family. I had the joy of being raised with three biological siblings and three adopted siblings and I fell right in the middle of these six awesome people. It’s no wonder that when my husband and I met, I was quick to let him know that someday I wanted to adopt. Thankfully, God had placed different experiences throughout his life that led him to have a heart for adoption too. 

Fast forward to the second year of our marriage and Ben and I were starting our foster care journey. We decided to wait a few years to start our family. Knowing that reunification is the goal of foster care, we entered ready to build relationships with birth families and offer support needed to help reunification. Deep down, we also knew that adoption was a possibility. Both outcomes sounded awesome at the time. We were ready to see what God had for us. 

By the time we were licensed, God started stirring a desire in me to start a family sooner than I had first thought. On May 31, 2012, Ben and I were planning on going for a bike ride, but God had other plans and our agency called to let us know a four month old little boy needed a home for a while. The day our sweet Liam entered our home is one that truly made time stand still and one that only God could have pieced together. The first time I held this sweet little boy he had the biggest smile and sweetest personality. It was as if he immediately knew he was home! We loved our sweet Liam instantly, but we were aware that his birth mother also loved him. And even though she obviously had hard things going on in her life, we wanted to honor her and the attachment she and Liam already had. We were committed to encouraging her. There is no doubt that while there is beauty in adoption, there is also heartache. Days and weeks and months went by. Visits were missed and the case plan wasn’t worked. Throughout our foster care journey, we were able to meet with Liam’s birth mom twice. I am so thankful that God allowed us the opportunity to meet her. I see her sweet laugh and smile in Liam all the time and she and Liam share a bond in their ability to share encouraging words. Our hearts hurt for the struggles she has faced in life and the heartache that she has had to encounter. But no doubt, God’s grace is covering her story, too. 

On February 19, 2014, one year and nine months after Liam entered our home and our hearts, we were officially able to adopt him and give him our last name. He was already our son as God had grown him in our hearts for years, but the joy of him officially being ours is like nothing else we have experienced. As I look back on our journey, I can only give God all praise and glory! What a wonderful God that He would bring our son into our lives in such an awesome way! It’s incredible to see God’s hand graciously leading our family and caring for Liam in sequence. Check out these awesome details that are only possible because of God:

  • God moved us to the county Liam was born the same month that Liam was conceived. 
  • The day before Liam was born, I prayed in my prayer journal for the child we would someday adopt. 
  • We had a friend stay with us when we first became licensed as a foster family. During this time, we received a call from placement about another child needing a home, but were unable to take this child since we didn’t have the room in our home at the time. This kept a room open in our home for when we were called about Liam. 
  • When the placement worker called us about Liam, she was looking for a family in our specific county. We had almost moved to the county next to us, but in God’s grace, He moved us to the county He knew we needed to be in for our son.
  • After Liam was adopted, we lost touch with his birth mom. By too many incredible details to write here, God brought our paths back together. I was able to meet with Liam’s birth mom one year after the adoption was final. It was such a sweet meeting to see her doing well and to hear her say that it was God’s plan for Liam to be with us and that she is happy he's with us. 
  • We ended up losing contact with Liam’s birth mom again, but by another miracle, in July 2018, God made a way for us to connect again. Liam’s birth mom texted letting us know that she is okay and that she loves us. We instantly saw the peace that came to Liam in knowing that his birth mom thought of him! Once again, we have lost contact with his birth mom, but we continue to pray for her and for another opportunity to be in contact.
  • Liam also has three birth brothers. We have been able to remain in contact with two of these birth brothers and visit once a year. This connection has been so special to all of us and we see Liam encouraged after every visit. 
  • We ended up getting two wonderful surprises in 2012! 😊 Liam came to us on May 31, 2012 and I found out I was pregnant in July 2012. No wonder God started stirring our hearts to start our family earlier than we had first planned. We now have three sons that are 6, 5 and 2! Psalm 127:3 sums it up so well.  “Children are a blessing from the Lord;”  -Amy from Daphne, AL

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